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Marriage Matters Part 2: Building a Marriage with the Bricks of our Words

Here we go gals, let's get building on our marriages.  And the bricks we are going to use come from our time we spend with Him.  I wrote about that in Part One: Building A Marriage That is Flourishing and Life-Giving.   If you haven't read it go back and start there.So you have spent time with the Lord and now you have some bricks.  But what kind of house will we build?  How does this work?

The Bible says:By wisdom a house is built,And by understanding it is established;And by knowledge the rooms are filledWith all precious and pleasant riches.Proverbs 24:3,4

Look what we get.  Rooms  that are filled with all precious and pleasant riches.  A beautifully rich, life-giving, flourishing marriage through wisdom, understanding and knowledge.  And we get those bricks in the time we are spending with Him.  These bricks help fill our house with precious and pleasant riches.Let's start with the bricks of  our words.  We can build up or tear down with our words.  We all know that.  Words can bring life.  Don’t you remember the hurtful things people say?  Those word wounds hurt long after they are said.Let us be women who use our words, our bricks, to build into our husbands.A wise woman builds her house, but the  foolish tear it down with her own hands. Proverbs 14:1

Affirm him with your words.

Things like, "You have what it takes."  Or, "I Believe in the Holy Spirit working in you."It is not to early to do this with your sons, too.  Men and boys want to know that they have what it takes.Find something to affirm in him."You are #1."  I say this often to Craig.  We laugh about this.  But y'all, our husbands are fighting out there in a very rough world.  You are building a refuge, a sanctuary for him with your words.

Build with words of respect

In Ephesians 5:33 we see what God says about this: Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband.Ephesians 5:33The Bible tells us to respect and our husbands to love.  WHY?  Because it is hard for us.We want him to love us whether or not we are lovable, but he better be respectable before I can respect him.  But God says to Respect our husbands.How do we respect with our words?

*Stop NAGGING

  We ask once and let God work.  Our timing isn’t always his timing.

*Stop second guessing

How debilitating is it when we say, "Yes, I trust you," or "You've got this," and then later come back and ask, "Are you sure?"   I have done this a kabillion times, just saying.

*Let him lead— No fear. 

We trust God and let our husbands lead.  Brick by brick we are building our home and we kick fear out as we trust God.

*Trust the Holy Spirit to work in your husband's heart and life.

There is one Holy Spirit, and you are not it.

*Say yes! more

Say yes to his ideas.  His leading. His plans.  This took me a longtime to believe that the Bear had good ideas, too.  Really?  How silly of me.Let's let 2018 be the year of YES!  This also includes sex and we will get to that later when we talk about the bricks of our actions.What is one tip or idea you could try this week with your words?  Write it down.  Ask God to help you.  Ask  a friend to hold you accountable.  Let's get building marriages that will change the world one house at a time.xoxo