Raising Boys :: Food = Love

 This is just a little part of  a series about raising boys.  With my four, I made a bunch of mistakes, but I also learned some things along the way.  Hope you find some encouragement here.Boys need food.  They just do.  Why did it take me so long to figure that one out?  I wanted conversation, relationship- they wanted a Sonic Slushy and some fries.  Or even a burger.The whole time I am thinking, didn’t we just eat? Or, are we not about to go home to eat?But, I think by the fourth boy, I finally figured it out.  Or, at least did a better job.

Food=Love

So simple. But to me, so complicated.I thought  love = talking, conversation, because that is what LOVE is for me.

But for these boys, food was L-O-V-E,

the door that sometimes opened to conversation.

I say sometimes because I also learned it did not always lead to conversation.  I learned I didn’t need to be yammering in their ears all the time.  Sometimes they would talk.  Sometimes not.  And I had to LEARN to be satisfied with that.  Learn, learn and learn some more.

You see, I have a little problem.  I tend to ask questions and boys, well boys, don’t like those questions.  No. Not so much.

One of my guys told me the reason he didn’t answer me one day when we got kind of cross-ways in the car is because if he answered the one question, he knew I wouldn’t stop.  One question would lead to the next.

I asked him, “Why do you think that?”

Oops - Busted!!

So, I Learned to stop for a Slushy.  A Smoothie.  A Jamba Juice. A Frostie. A little SURSEE for the guy.No matter the time of day.  No matter if we were about to go home to eat a meal.No, I wasn’t perfect.  I did not  always do this, but I tried to be intentional in this way of loving them.Food, glorious food.Sometimes there were conversations.  Sometimes not.  But they felt loved.

“Thanks, Mom, that was a great," as we drove home in Silence.

And I would think, “What?  We didn't talk at all.  What was so great about that?”But they felt loved. And I felt like I was---- #1 Mom.What do you do to feed the soul of your boy?  Share the SURSEES you have found.I just have to give a SHOUT OUT to Sonic and their Happy Hour!  Helped me out many a day.  Woo-Hoo!